SI's Peter King wants you to curb your dog but also wouldn't mind if a plane blows up

It’s hard coming up with content as the playoffs wind down, but Peter King provided some fodder today and since he tries to provide fantasy advice, he’s fair game. His latest MMQB is truly a tour de force of all his usual pablum: starts off making cyber man-love to Peyton Manning, segue ways into his fine 15 and awards where he slurps Peyton some more (along with everyone else whom he wants to keep on speed-dial), then enters that increasingly uncomfortable part where he gets a little TOO personal, if you catch my drift, and THAT is where I finally begin to truly hate the guy.

The bottom of page 4 talks about how a TSA worker FINALLY caught him failing to pack his toiletries in a zip-loc bag. “I have never carried my (toiletries) in a one-gallon Ziploc-type see-through bag, I guess because it's the most asinine law or rule ever created by an empty Washington suit in history. And that covers some ground. I just had no respect for it,” he starts off, concluding with, “I bet I've taken 60 flights with the rule being what it is, and why was this the first TSA woman doing her job? Not that I minded everyone else not doing the correct job.”

So, Peter King doesn’t mind that planes may blow up in the future because the law is 'asinine' and it’s okay to not follow laws (or rules; there’s a difference, Peter) that are 'asinine'. Okay, he has the right to feel this way; this is America, after all.

He also has the right to look like an idiot and have this idiocy written about on the Internets.

I say that because this looks incredibly idiotic when compared with the ‘story’ immediately preceding this one. In it, he stops slurping Peyton just long enough to slurp Drew Brees (or maybe he locked them both in at once like a pair of fingercuffs) and virtually pins a medal on his chest for picking up his dog’s ‘business’. “Second in the MVP voting, first in the all-pro voting at quarterback, and he picks up dog doo. That's what I call a heck of an American,” lauds Peter.

So, let me see if I’ve got this straight. We have these things out there called “laws” (or “rules”, says Peter). But they don’t really matter; you can ignore the ones you don’t like. If you happen to follow a law Peter thinks should be ignored, you’re being a stick in the mud and inconveniencing people. If you follow a law Peter likes (I’m assuming Peter doesn’t like looking at dog crap, although he likes writing about crap, both his own and that of animals), you deserve a medal.

Personally, I would be happy to pick up some extra dog crap around the neighborhood if it would guarantee 100% that a plane won't blow up. Or, if Peter wants, I can instead stand next to him and stop him from talking about crap (figuratively and literally). Makes no difference to me.